Aside from the dream world offering us a literal escape from the day-to-day restrictions we place on ourselves, Marsden says that sex dreams in particular actually occur more often when we're feeling confident. Our dreams reflect how we are feeling. Our brain also has a way of using our dreams to act out scenarios that are unlikely or unrealistic in our day-to-day lives.
In terms of the most frequently reported star of these dreams, the boss scenario tops the list. Often people symbolize other people in a dream, and it is really more about the emotions that you are experiencing. However, this doesn't necessarily mean you're pining after your superior — more likely, it's the power that he or she symbolizes that you crave.
You may be feeling ready to take charge and move your job to the next level compared to where you are now professionally. What does it mean when the tables are turned, and you're the one in the position of authority, seducing your intern or friend's younger sibling? Marsden says the answer lies in the context of the dream. Most likely, this is our desire to be dominant in bed with someone we would feel comfortable with, someone we know.
Another common dream scenario that can be troubling is the one where we're getting it on with our friend's significant other. But clinical psychologist Dr. Alexis Conason points out that what might be lurking underneath the meaning of this one is actually not an attraction you've worked to bury, but rather, a symbol of something else that might be happening in the relationship between you and your friend.
What about if the object of your affection is that best friend, not his or her significant other? Marsden says that because we spend so much time with our close friends , it's not surprising that they might show up in our dreams this way — no matter how bizarre it can be to experience this.
This one might leave you waking up in a panic depending on how things ended with said ex. Loewenberg says dreams like this could be stemming from similarities between your past and current relationship. Cue a sigh of relief. More pressing is the opportunity to take a deep-dive within. In dreamland, none of that matters. Fran Walfish , Beverly Hills family and relationship psychotherapist, previously told Bustle.
While anyone can have dreams about not performing well in bed, it's especially common for people who identify as male to feel impotent and insecure in their dreams. In any case, dreaming that you aren't performing well in bed deserves a closer look so you can figure out what's triggering it. A licensed sex therapist can help you work through these feelings and gain confidence in yourself and your sex life. Dreaming about having sex in a car or in the woods isn't as cut-and-dry as you might think.
Again, take a look at what's going on in your waking life, and see if you can connect those dots. Depending on your ex, this could be a good dream or a really, really bad one. But in both instances, it can be pretty confusing. But thankfully, the truth is often much simpler than that. Maybe you accidentally stumbled upon one of their TikToks or are coming up on a date that used to be significant to the two of you, like an anniversary.
And now your ex is in your subconscious. Usually, you should feel free to brush it off and forget about them. But, "if you find your ex has a starring role in your thoughts , then it may reflect something more, and you want to take some time to investigate what that is about," Milrad says. You might even consider talking with friends about it or going to therapy to figure out what role your ex is still playing in your life.
Do you have steamy, fantastical dreams about hooking up with your favorite celebrity? Surprisingly, "most often, dreams about having sex with someone famous reflect your desire to feel special, important in the world, and have people take note of you," she says. Dreams that revolve around violence or even abuse are obviously upsetting. Even dreams about mind-blowing, super amazing sex — the kind that have the potential to give you an orgasm while you sleep — are worth taking a closer look at, beyond how sexy they are on the surface.
Also, don't forget that whatever you feel in a dream may be something you'd like to feel in waking life — like mind-blowing sex.
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